Again, this Sunday, I found myself browsing the racks of Victorias Secret for no apparent reason. It wasn't like I needed any more undergarments. But I just could not resist.
Soon I found myself in the dressing room trying on a sweet little black mesh bra with a smartly placed smattering of black sequins. I visually checked out the situation in the mirror. Soon, my thoughts were interupted with concern. What if this bra isn't pleasing to the touch? So I did what any normal girl would do - I grabbed each one of my boobs and started to feel the material as to judge whether or not it would be acceptable for an external visitor.
So as I stood there, holding onto my boobs there was a knock on the door:
Salesgirl: Do you need a hand in there?
Myself: (Looks down) No, I think I have everything under control.
$78 later I left with one bra - and one underwear. At least they match.
14 year old Montana ranch kid ropes drowning man out of Yellowstone River
[Hero]
-
[image: Hero] [link] [7 comments]
1 hour ago
Posts
23 comments:
Wow, I'm strangely turned on right now... Is that bad?
sequins....i hate those things.
Immediately upon writing this entry I showed Aaron. He commented that if I wrote about my boobs (or adventures in VS) that my site would actually become popular.
I see you all liked the subject matter. (The un-named gentleman who got to see the purchases did as well.)
to Ipex. Ipexing. It is now a verb.
Mark - its completely normal. I mean, it is ME we are talking about.
Josh- I wouldn't expect any less from you.
Gozer (?) - But in this case, sequins are probably good, right?
a) Could it be? Would it be? Is it THE Ian?
b) Oh, believe me, I was thinking dirty the first time. You are talking to the girl who writes about grasping her boobs to test out a bras many qualities.
Who wants to feel a bra? The only part I feel is the clasp in the back.
Ruppel
Does that go with the addage: It looks best on my bedroom floor?
Not entirely related, but I was watching Threshold a few minutes ago.
An agent and a sperm bank employee were looking up the records of a frequent donor, and a 2nd agent says, "I prefer to to give my donations in person."
That agent is a midget on the tall side of the kind.
Good old CBS.
How is that related at all?
Or did you just want to say "sperm" on my site?
I thought it was related in some way when I originally typed it up.
But tonight? Not sure what I was thinking.
But Jackie - sperm.
Oh, Aaron, you are such a badass by saying "sperm" on my site. If I had a story about sperm I would post it. But I don't. I am, thankfully, spermless.
Matt--- UNBLOCK MY COMMENTS FROM YOUR SITE. ITS MAKING ME MAD!
Aaron and I can't have facebook because we don't have valid University email addresses.
We tried. We tried to cheat the system. It beat us.
We have been discriminated against because we have degrees. We are organizing a "Down with Degree Discrimination" Protest in the near future.
I feel like I was gone for a day and you guys just spermed up my whole page. I better post something else about my boobs quick.
Jackie, 23 comments. I am impressed.
Re: facebook. I'm going to sperm all over that website when I ping my loopback address tonight.
That's right - geek masturbation euphemism. Write that one down.
Aaron - you are pure geek.
I'm still pissed about the facebook thing. Bastards.
New post about boobs tomorrow if I get a picture emailed to me.
"New post about boobs tomorrow if I get a picture emailed to me."
Do WE get to see the picture?
Also Jackie: vetgymrp, wtf.
i saw a band that thanked facebook onstage.
and myspace. i think they called myspace a friend.
i wanted to punch everyone who clapped.
Lots of Alums at different schools have facebook because they probably are awareded ALUMNI email for spending thousands of dollars at their university. Mine, however, promptly removes your email access one month after graduation. Bastards. Dan's school, however, has awarded him life-long access to facebookedness. Maybe he is a member of the "ALUMNI SOCIETY" and thats a perk? I've seen my alumni book - it blows.
I have 7 new emails. Hopefully all of them won't be porn and one will be a picture. Well, maybe I do want them all to be porn.
Yeah Aaron: xngoz. It made me laugh again.
P.S. He was wearing a XXL sweatshirt on Thursday. But I may settle for a XL. You guys were way off.
Only the chocolate kind.
ptyab.
XXL? Are you dating John fucking Goodman?
xgpnaiq!
He says he has a shrinkage problem.
I can attest to the fact that he does not.
ayyzk
Yes. I am dating Kevin Bacon. You all caught me. Damnit. Now my secret is exposed.
Seriously, XXL or XL aren't that big once you send them through the dryer on High Heat.
I guess we will see when the XL gets delivered and presented...
boring one today: cghyv.
So, if by chance, I licked him could I consider myself to be "eating Bacon?"
Matt, did you figure out our secret code?
love you: aijlm.
Damn. And I thought it was so clever.
I guess maybe I should think about posting something new.
Ooooh: hehcdfa.
Would ya could ya hehcd fa.
Do you feel almost as if YOU have made out with Kevin Bacon yourself?
what the f?: cdrxbkk
Post a Comment